Look at the models on television and magazines and then at the mirror. Spot the difference?

Your cute smile is genuine.

That’s what you are supposed to look at and not how he or she looks in terms of physique and superficial beauty.

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It is their business. It is a job. You don’t see a NASA scientist and feel bad that you are not one!

The model has to smile a plastic smile and pretend to like everyone. They are not supposed to grimace or even stop their ramp walk even when there is a wardrobe malfunction.

That’s their job description.

You are not in that business. You have something else to do. And you look and dress accordingly. If anything you can appreciate and critique the models on being what they are for the products they endorse and the performance they produce.

Do not imitate them and worst of all; don’t look down upon yourself in comparison to them.

That would be gross injustice to you.

And the idea of beauty itself…

Is a cute child beautiful or a perfect pedicure?

An amazing smile beautiful or a cosmetic-surgery inspired body beautiful?

A fit and healthy body beautiful or an anorexia-fueled pencil-thin figure beautiful?

Healthy is beautiful. Smiling personality is beautiful.

Body ages.

Soul doesn’t.

Trying to fight nature and going under the knife to wade off the wrinkles and extra flab is effectively stopping yourself from aging gracefully.

Every age brings with it, its own beauty.

Allow it to happen. Eat healthy, exercise and welcome the year next.

When in adolescence we want to age fast and when in mid age, we want to grow young.

The secret is that both can be achieved… In the mind.

Do you know why most of the relationships come to an untimely end?

Lack of understanding.

Do you know why most of the relationships lack understanding?

Lack of conversational time.

That’s the fact. Not many even understand the need to talk to each other in a relationship. There lies the problem. You should know what it takes to hold a relationship together. Sit and talk with your beloved as simple as that.

Yes, it is as simple as that. It doesn’t cost anything, but time. Time is what your beloved would need. The precious time that you are willing to expend at work and/or with friends is the time he or she needs.

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Get your priorities right. Yes, you need your space and time, but not at the cost of losing it at where it matters more.

Often times, we take our relationships at default and that is a problem. Not many try to find out what the story with the other person is.

Whether the individual involved needs your ear or shoulder you can’t fathom until you know what’s plaguing them, right?

Get involved and get to know.

And always remember the reason why you got into a relationship or a marriage in the first place.

You were in love.

You wanted to be cared for. You cared.

Don’t forget those little things and your life will be infinitely happier.

And here is the clincher: You will never know how much the individual and the relationship meant to you until you lose it. And when you do lose it, it is almost impossible to get it back.

Things that are sold can be bought back, but feelings that are hurt never reciprocate. They leave you high and dry and you would have all the time in the world for the individual now, but he or she wouldn’t.

Beware and be ready.

The three Cleveland women abducted when they were girls and escaped a decade later is a heartstrings pulling story. It is one of those stories that make us seriously doubt if there are human-faced monsters living among us. At least we know where the wild animals are and what their characteristics are, but these fiends with no heart are around us in the garb of humans.

It is scary. Our hearts go out to the victims and we pray for their emotional recovery and hope they live a normal life for the rest of their lives.

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That said, how much can we trust a neighbor anymore?

The neighbors of the alleged kidnapper have been telling the media and anyone who would listen that they didn’t have a clue. They never had any reason to suspect this man at all. He was just another guy and that was just another house.

Even his brothers who were suspected at first but later cleared by the cops say the same thing. They never knew he was such a monster.

You can fight a devil with a name and face, but not an abnormal man in normal human being attire.

There are two heroes who have come out of this too. Two guys who helped the victim when she sought help and got the cops on the scene. The emotional outpouring of love by the country and the world as a whole was a sobering sight.

Such criminal acts can be stopped if we don’t ignore the warning signs when we notice them. Call the cops if you find something suspicious. It is okay if it comes out as nothing and you feel embarrassed later, but if it is true and gets a victim saved then it is worth it.

Criminals commit crimes as long as we are vulnerable but if the society strikes back they will have nowhere to hide.

Be vigilant.

That’s the moral.

We toil hard all our lives to achieve something. We work 80 hour weeks, sometimes both day and night and then some to make ends meet. We pray and believe in God to work miracles for us to keep our family healthy and happy. We do all the chores that there is to make ourselves happy.

We expect rewards for all our hard work and we feel happy when we get it. True.

We are also happy when another person we know works as hard as us or more and gets his just rewards. That is something we cheer and take inspiration from.

What we can’t digest is instant rewards for nothing.

Reality shows, rings a bell?

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Pop culture in America right now is all about reality shows that is throwing up heroes of no substance at an alarmingly frenetic pace.

Mediocrity is being celebrated and it has left the normal hard working Americans confused. If this is how you can make money and can make that amount of money without any work, forget hard work, then what are we doing work so hard day in and day out?

And if being immoral and being caught doing bad things are what makes you famous… then where is the morality we learnt all our life about and were asked to practice?

Where is the family value system?

If the kid learns that being addicted, singing stray songs on lost love and wearing next to nothing when you touch adolescence can bring you money in millions, how can a parent go talk about how important hard work is and how important morality is to the kids?

Instant rewards are harmful as you can see with these teen stars. They go downhill once they see money without much work; they don’t even know what to do with it. And they believe it will keep coming.

It won’t. And when it stops they don’t know what to do without it.

There is a reason why hard work pays late. It gets you mature, used to and then rewards.

That way you would know the value of it.

There are three relationships that matter the most…

Familial

Professional

Societal

Familial relationships are the one that we take for granted. Most times you don’t need to even work on these relationships as they are ties of blood and birth and stay forever and you are conveniently forgiven whenever you err.

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Spouse or sibling, your attitude is always that they are going to be there for you no matter what. True. But that doesn’t mean you should completely ignore them. These people crave for your attention and you should give them that. There could be your uncle or aunt who has this desire to see you at least once a month and your attitude is that you are happy meeting them only on Christmas.

Do not make that mistake; you wouldn’t know the value of someone until they are no more to be heard from.

Professional relationships exist. First, believe that. A colleague-friend relationship always exists. You got to nurture this relationship as the more you resist or be indifferent towards your colleagues the more they would fear you as to what your intentions are. Work environment is infested with insecure people most of the time and indifference would definitely breed paranoid activity.

Be wary of that and connect with your colleagues naturally.

Societal relationships are those you have with your doctor, local cop, mailman, grocer and the community heads who matter. Even well wishers and good friends are a part of this. Societal relationships allow yourself to get noticed by a good number of people and this will lead to you wielding a fair bit of influence in the place you live. You never know when you would need them and this relationship will give you the much needed connections to get things done when such a need arises.

Be aware of people who matter to you and be in touch with them as it will help you in the long run.

On a lazy Sunday afternoon, one tends to browse channels for lack of anything to do or the will to do it. And then you come upon some movie from years before playing. You stop and watch with a cheeky smile the movie that was a part of your growing up days.

You find that you are not just watching the movie, but are getting nostalgic. You start remembering things, start remembering those things that happened when you first saw the movie.

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Maybe that sibling fight you had; maybe the first date you went to or maybe some memorable incident involving the best friend of yours while growing up… They all play it out on your mind while you watch the movie.

The best part is, the movie may not be great, but it doesn’t matter. It is incidental, but for the joy it brings with the memories of yore.

This is when you remember how far you have come from those days and how many people you genuinely miss. That is when you take out your phone and find that number of your friend whom you thought you would get in touch with, but never found the time to.

You call that number and talk to him and make your and his day special with smiles all around. Then you search for all those friends you miss, but never made time to catch up with and send them all a greeting card making the day extra special and beautiful.

This is how it should be.

It is okay to be not in touch, but not for long. You got to buzz those relationships into life before it is too late. Genuine love and affection is a rarity these days.

Make an effort to preserve what you have got.

When you are in trouble whom do you talk to?

Family?

Friend?

Or

God?

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There are certain restrictions even when talking to your family or friend, but not with God. You can be open to Him. And you know why? Because He knows everything already, you are just giving Him a gist of what happened to you anyway!

The reason we talk to God is to be honest with ourselves. We need someone to listen and it is better if we talk to someone who can do something about it without judging us, right?

Does He ever reply back?

No?

Hmmm… I bet, He does.

Not about to figure out how? Let me tell you. Reply is not always in words. Have you noticed that feeling that you feel once you have opened up about yourselves to Him? The feeling of sweet emptiness that envelopes you and the peace you feel and the spring in your walk?

Who put that in you?

Him. That was His reply.

He does hear and He does reply. It is just that we don’t recognize His love. That is the problem with our lot as humans. We don’t recognize true love, but we waste no time in idolizing the wrong ones.

Emotions are pure be it love or hate. Be emotive and recognize emotions that come your way. Don’t look for the words, but feelings too.

Try to make the planet you live a happy place by being true to yourself and being true to others. It is not that hard really. In fact, to be otherwise is hard and we have practiced that.

So, why not this which is more fun and good.

Give it a try.

Time and again one has noticed that timely help helps. Yes, if you give poor child a race car, he will be happy for a moment, but if you give him three meals a day, he would grow healthy. And if you educate him, he may change the world.

There are a lot of philanthropists out there, but how many believe in involving themselves in the cause?

Money thrown away remains thrown away. Money calculated and spent with logical reasoning towards a cause elevates the act of giving and makes the cause a success.

Help shouldn’t be about an act from a selfish part of the heart for its own happiness, but it should be borne out of love. Any act performed with kindness works.

Attitude determines if an act is great or routine.

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Boston marathon had people who stand out prime examples of timely help when they lent a hand to those who lost their limbs. More than their life saving act, it is their act itself that made the bomb victims feel that they are not alone and their handicap won’t be something that will confine them in a four-wall enclosure.

What the volunteers did that day made the will of the survivors strong. That is the most you can give an ailing person.

The confidence and these volunteers gave it without even noticing it.

Giving is something that anyone can do, but giving without ignorance of the cause is the way to go. Educate yourself on what you are dealing with, dissect it step by step and see how you can funnel in the money to help. Set benchmarks, achieve them and tell the world.

Inspire many who wouldn’t have thought about it before. When it is in black and white with evidence and results, it is tough to argue to oneself about not opening up the wallet. You can open the floodgates to giving if you do it right yourself and show the same to the world.

Preparation for the day at work starts when you wake up. Yes, if you wake up all happy and kicked about facing the day and the challenges it will bring at work, then you love what you do.

Choose a career and not a job. Not everyone is fortunate enough to get a career. A lot of them just get by doing jobs. If you ask me for the difference between the two… I would say, job is something you do when you haven’t found your career.

Job is something that you don’t enjoy but do it for money. Career is something that you look forward to and build your life on.

In your workplace too, you will find both these people, people with jobs and people with careers. You may not know who holds what, but you can be considerate to both… Especially if you are blessed with a career.

There is a reason why certain little celebrations and fun moments are organized in an office. It keeps the atmosphere light and not suffocating. You can celebrate the birthday of a colleague and make him feel special.

That small party in the midst of all cubicles breaks the monotony and brings in the zing and palpable camaraderie into play.

Work while you work and play while you play is the adage, but again there has to be a little bit of play in the middle of backbreaking work. Just not the little parties and celebrations, but also a kind word helps. That is why you got to have friends at work.

Make friends freely, they know you better and your work better as they are around you in a 24-hour day more than anyone else in your life.

That’s the fact. Make your workplace a fun place to be.

Love comes in varied colors and multitude of contours. There is nothing constant in love. It evolves. It all depends on what it holds and when it started. There may be umpteen reasons to fall in love and there may be no reason at all.

It doesn’t ask questions, but just gives. Unconditional love is different. When you love someone unconditionally you tend to find a way to love even their faults. When the love is conditional, you find a way to hate even the romantic gestures. It is the way it is.

That is why never rush in love.

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Wait until it envelops you. Wait until it is reciprocated. Wait until you can’t live without each other. Wait until you can live for each other. And then fall for it head first. It is okay then. There is always the other to hold on to.

Many couples make this basic mistake. Wedding is once in a lifetime thing. Hard to believe that in a world where everyone marries at least twice, but again, it was meant to be once.

And divorces were a taboo, but not anymore. When the choice is on the table, everyone has half an eye on it.

Family is replaced by couch shrinks. We are happy to unload all our angst and emotional drivel to a complete stranger, but not to our family. Even worse, why can’t we just talk it out with the person you are in love with?

Half the time relationships break because of miscommunication or no communication at all.

And sometimes, too much communication.

It is like a recipe, too much of anything or one ingredient less and then you get a dish that you can’t put in your mouth.

Such are relationships; you got to strike a balance.