It’s the Valentine’s Day week. It is so rightful to address this dichotomy at this time. Lately Emily, Donna’s young and beautiful daughter fell in love with a very handsome boy Jeremy who is from Durham, United Kingdom. He is urbane and graceful, quite different from the young American lads who are fast and mostly unembellished. “I feel more like a lady with him around,” She said with flair one afternoon when they both were visiting our place for lunch. He was dressed in a tuxedo with a black tie which had a vintage look while she flaunted a flowing silk gown with scarlet stole and smelling of a perfume which was quintessentially French.
She was the color of rose and there was a promise in his eyes. I loved the love which was emanating from their presence. The soft sound of giggles on a private joke between them, the electrifying hugs, the shared dreams, and the streak of jealousy, the fluttering eye-lids and the gentle kisses spoke volumes about the escalating passion between the two of them. The magic of falling in love is so enticing and always takes me back to the days when everything about Aaliyah would cause a stir and I would eat, breathe and sleep love and the romance angels would spread their magic around both of us so much so that the whole world would be a blur.
Now, it is different kind of love. The frills are gone. I realize staying in love is far more exciting and yet the most comforting place to be in. The fretting and craving is no more and caring has taken its place. Last weekend she was on her all-girls’ trip and I was reading a book alone in the backyard in the warm wintry breeze. It would be an issue to fuss about earlier but now it is glossed over easily without a thought.
When we fall in love we see what we want to see. We imagine qualities which are important for us rather than seeing the one without our desire tinted glasses. But as we move on in a relationship the outlook changes and we start seeing the stark reality, the imperfections and staying in love implies embracing the flaws and looking in the eyes, it is there we find the other person.
No matter how comfortable we are in each other’s skin, it’s important to keep the passion flying as those warm, enthusiastic feelings, the chills, the excitement of touch are all like the cherry on top of the sundae which cannot be missed. The ways we do it is by taking vacations with ‘just’ each other, keeping the intimacy a part of the daily life, surprising each other with a romantic gesture which is unpredictable. Remember to feel love in every moment. After all for us there’s no rush now and that’s comforting.
So this Valentine’s Day remember to fall in love and stay in love.