This week I have a different take on positive thinking. Do teddy bears have a place in a teen’s room? Let’s find out, along with my dating fiasco and a mom’s tips to social networking.

Mind over matter – that is what positive thinking is all about. That’s what Ryan told us the other day. He’s really psyched these days about being motivated and staying focused. He’s telling everyone around him that with the right intention and desire, nothing is impossible. There is no originality of thought in what Ryan is saying, though. I mean, we hear this baloney every now and then. Does it actually make a difference? Is there a conflict between being optimistic and realistic at the same time?

If you have not crawled out of a rock recently, you know that things don’t really fall into place just on the strength of your will power. I believe that it’s important to think positively but you must also be practical. Being delusional about your state of affairs and hoping for something that is nothing short of miracle is not the ideal way. To realize the powers of positive thinking, you got to be aiming at achievable goals. A practical evaluation of your summit is important to reach there.

Rachael has to take a tough decision now. Like every other girl of her age, Rachael has teddy bears all over her room. Rachael is a person who likes to be surrounded by cute objects that are exquisitely feminine. Over the years, the number of teddy friends she has amassed is quite stupendous. Well into her teens now, Rachael is thinking of letting go of her dearest friends before the close of summer. Rachael is accustomed to living with them and is really reluctant to let go.

Liz, her mom and my sister, was telling me how Rachael is in two minds. “It’s the association that is keeping her tied,” Liz told me. If Rachael was not attached to a real world outside, then maybe she would have loved to keep these furry friends in her room. But you know how we have to adapt ourselves and do things just to fit in. Being teens, Rachael’s friends visiting her would really laugh their heads off if they found her room packed with teddy bears!

My relationship with Sarah was not running smoothly over the last couple of months. We would stop communicating every now and then. And then suddenly there would be a text from her. I would be tempted to reply to that. Sarah would probably call and we would talk for a while. But that sense of heaviness hung in the air. We couldn’t talk with the bubbly enthusiasm that we had once. At long last, I asked her out for a date to sort things out.

I was there at the designated coffee shop well before time. I waited for about twenty minutes. I sent her a couple of text messages. There was no reply. I went back home. Late in the night, Sarah apologized for not showing up and fixed another date. I reluctantly agreed. This time I was not punctual. When I walked in late, I could see no one. I thought Sarah waited and moved home. I called her. Apparently, Sarah didn’t show up at all! That was the last straw. I never contacted her again.

This is the age of networking. Donna’s children, Ethan and Emily, are actively into it. But being the cautious mom that she is, Donna pulled them down for a little chat on how they can be safe online. Donna advised them to accept only those friends that they knew personally. Ethan objected to it! He said, “But mom, the point of networking is to meet new people!” Donna replied, “Not at the cost of safety! At best, check for mutual friends.” That was more acceptable to Ethan.

Donna was not done. Then the siblings were told not to share their photos indiscriminately and keep them under private settings. Donna told them to keep those private jokes for the covert conversations. “You don’t want to hurt a friend by sharing something that is hurtful with a whole bunch of people,” Donna said. But the piece of advice that Donna really stressed on was that they must not update something about their school or teachers. “That is a total no-no!” Donna warned them.

Here’s what networking consultant Bob Burg has to say about connecting with people: “It isn’t just what you know, and it isn’t just who you know. It’s actually who you know, who knows you, and what you do for a living.”