This week I reflect on what we know as ‘true love’. Does it exist? Also, I learn some lessons in life, attend a fabulous birthday and end up with a Zen pamphlet! Join me on this…

Is there something called true love? Or is it something that chick-lit novels and movies want us to believe in to keep us going? Like UFOs or some similar urban myth that asserts their presence only in the minds of those in doubt. Such thoughts cross your mind specially when you have fallen out of love or a relationship that you gave your all fell apart like a castle of cards. Finding that ideal person and that perfect relationship to last a lifetime isn’t possible. With age, you realize that true love isn’t waiting for you somewhere. It’s there, deep inside you. Simmering, brewing and slowly building up like water closeted by a dam.

When you meet the right person, it surges out like a long-held secret. That’s when you want things to work out. You are ready to commit and accept responsibilities for your actions. In a very practical sense of the term, it’s when you are open to share your life without feeling the need to draw boundaries. A relationship, like a house, cannot be kept in a perfect state without working on it every single day. A small chink will become a large crack in no time at all. You have to be vigilant, sensitive and perceptive. All the pieces will fall in place like a Rubik’s Cube when you are finally in the company of that one special person.

Eleanor was explaining to me and Adrian the other day about being thankful in life. Remember the innovative thank you that her son and his wife sent her? Eleanor cannot stop gushing about it, though it’s been some days since. On an evening over coffee, Eleanor was telling us about her parents. They were simple folks who understood only the straight and the obvious. Much like my parents. Eleanor was reminiscing how they taught her to be thankful about the little things in life. “We have reasons to be thankful every single moment” is what her mother used to tell her. Eleanor has built her life on those simple teachings.

You can sense from the way Eleanor lives her life that she has little or no regrets. Eleanor feels for the stressful lives that we live. Her advice is, “Count your blessings!” It’s simple really, if you want to go by what Eleanor is saying. Eleanor tell us to be thankful about what we have rather than be upset about what we desire and crave for, but can’t attain. It’s a completely different way of looking at things. Eleanor feels that once we forget to be thankful for what we have, nothing we achieve will be enough to satisfy us. Food for thought.

The popular culture has often tickled the impressionistic minds to imitate them in their own lives. Emily, Donna’s daughter, is a huge fan of Edward Cullen, the Twilight saga guy! On her birthday, Emily wanted to do something with the Twilight theme. Donna stepped in to organize a birthday party so fantastic in styling, so innovative in thought that we were left gasping for breath. The color red was literally painted all over the venue. It was the single shade of crimson red, that majestic tone that makes itself counted even in a rainbow of colors. The decorations were complete with Twilight-themed drinks, cakes and even party favors.

Donna created a white chocolate fountain and added oil-based red food dye to it! It looked like a blood bath out there! The birthday cake was similarly done up, with red candles and apples on the sides to give it that vampire feel. It was one of the best birthdays ever. Emily couldn’t stop raving about what her mother has made for her. It was quite exquisite and Emily’s friends, no doubt Twilight fans themselves, turned up in costumes that complemented the decor. The success of the birthday established the fact that moms can actually do anything if they set themselves out to do so!

“Been losing your temper too soon? Help is at hand!”, Ryan tossed these words into every cubicle as he passed through to his own. He walked in late today, with a dossier on his hand. Though no one turned up to try out whatever Zen tips he might have, he was not one to give up. Ryan was active at lunch, with some handouts. He was thrusting a paper into clenched palms of many co-workers. We, Steve and myself, were bystanders till then. Finally we decided to cross over to check what Ryan was trying to pass off as a new mantra to gain control over things, especially the annoying ones. There it was sitting in the dossier: some rolled up pamphlets containing some quotes.

The story is, Ryan has joined a sort of meditative society. The Zen master there has asked Ryan to get some members for the group! Ryan is completely hooked to these sessions where he feels like an “empty vessel”. Steve picked up a pamphlet with characteristic disdain. There were some steps to hold your nerve in the face of annoyance. The usual: deep breathing, take a step back, laugh it off. Nothing that I have not read or knew about. I mentioned so. Ryan was quick: “That’s the thing, dude! You have read and you know. Do you practice?” As I looked at him with surprise, he folded one of the pamphlets and smilingly slid it in my chest pocket.

Trust a writer to read whatever he can get hold off! Here’s a Mahatma Gandhi quote from that pamphlet: “The future depends on what we do in the present.”