Hope you’re doing well. I’m glad to tell you folks that my friends, Irina, Fred and Rick are all back home safe and sound. And boy, do I have stories to tell ya! I also have a small confession to make, and there’s also an update on Rachael–she’s growing up fast! Read on…

First, let’s get it over with–my confession. I can’t tell ya how much I really appreciate your support on Facebook and MySpace. I’m really glad to finally “meet” many of you and it’s great to have you as friends. You guys made me so excited about adding friends that I came back to work the other night. I was walking Kong and decided to head into the office. I didn’t want you to wait on the friend requests, and I didn’t want to miss anyone.

You know when you get on the Internet and you just get sucked in? There’s so much to do! I lost track of time and Kong started wandering around. When I looked at the clock, it was 11:00 PM already! I had to search for Kong and then went home and crashed.

In the morning when I came in, everyone was talking in low voices. So I asked, “What’s up? What’s the matter, Donna?” “You won’t believe what happened, Bob–someone pooped in the boss’s office. And it’s not one of them plastic poops either!” Donna whispered, trying to keep a straight face. I was surprised, “It’s too late to be an April Fools’ joke… but who would do such a th–,” I stopped mid-sentence when I realized that I had played a role in the poop fiasco.

I slowly crept into my cubicle and started writing this newsletter… what do you think I should do? Own up to it and tell them it was my fault or just let it be? What would you do if you were in my shoes? Email me and let me know! Stay tuned…

My niece, Rachael, is growing up so fast that I can hardly keep up! She’s going to have her elementary school graduation soon and well, she had a small incident with the opposite sex… She didn’t know who to talk to. She didn’t want to go straight to Liz, her mom. So she talked to me about it. Liz and David were going out for a romantic dinner that night so I had to babysit Rachael. She was first acting funny, like she had something to say. She wasn’t doing a very good job of hiding it, either–she’s someone who speaks her mind whenever a thought hits her.

Sensing her unease, I asked her, “What’s on your mind, Rachael? Is there something you want to talk about?” Rachael was quiet at first. “Well… something happened at school the other day…” she was hesitant to share, so I just kept quiet to give her time. “I got kissed by a boy.” I didn’t know what I was supposed to say. So I just said, “Oh, was he any good?” trying to act normal. “What’s good? I dunno. But he’s cute,” she said. I started smiling. “It happened after school, we came out of the class late that day. We were working on a group project together for the science fair. We just finished writing our report and sticking pictures on the poster board. My teacher went out of the class for a second, and that’s when Tommy kissed me,” Rachael looked up at me, uncertain.

Then she asked, “What was your first kiss like, Uncle Bob?” Another surprise. “Um… well, Megan and I were playing on the monkey bars, and a couple of our friends dared us to kiss while we were on there. I think we were in first or second grade. I was shy, but Megan swung over and kissed me smack on the lips. I was so shocked I almost let go of the bar,” Rachael started giggling and asked, “That’s so sweet. Did you guys ever go out?” “No, we’ve always been friends. That’s how it’ll be, I think.” And I asked, “So, are you going to tell your mother about Tommy?” Rachael started smiling again and said, “Ya, I think I’ll tell both of them tomorrow.” I’m just glad she felt she could talk to me. That was very important to me.

Megan and I have come a long way since our monkey bar days. I mean, we’ve moved to the East Coast and we’re still friends. Not a lot of people can make that claim. Poor Megan, her Passover dinner in Greenfield, MA didn’t go as well as she hoped for. Seth and Megan had never been on a road trip together and well, sometimes you get to know the real person when you’re traveling with them. She called me up, telling me that she needed to talk to me. I picked her up at the train station, hoping to cheer her up. She told me the whole story on our way to her apartment.

“We started off in the evening because Seth had to work,” Megan recounted, “so by the time we hit Hartford, it was dark. I was supposed to be navigating, and you know I’m not good with maps, especially when it comes to New England roads. I was doing okay until we exited the turnpike and headed into the woods. I think that’s when we started getting lost. I didn’t know which route we were on and we must’ve missed an exit. Then we had a flat tire in the middle of the road. We didn’t pack food or anything because we intended to go straight to his parent’s place. So we were hungry and we were lost in the middle of the woods.”

“He started yelling at me, telling me that I don’t even know how to read a map blah blah blah. I tuned out after a while, Bob. I mean, this was supposed to be a big step in our relationship and it turned into a nightmare,” she was teary-eyed. Seth meant a lot to Megan, especially after she lost her job. She really cared for this guy, you know?

She looked sad, I couldn’t do anything except listen. “Seth’s not the only guy in New York City. There’s plenty of fish in the pond,” I said, not knowing what else to tell her. I really wanted to cheer her up. She forced a smile, “Thanks for picking me up. I needed a morale boost.” Are Megan and Seth getting back together? I don’t know. I think Megan just needs a break. I’ll keep you posted on how she’s doing.

I like being there for my friends; I think it’s the most important part of friendship. But I’m glad I didn’t go on the road trip to Philly with Irina, Fred and Rick, this was one time I needed to stay out. And I made the right choice, for once! Remember last week I told you that the dynamic trio were going to Philadelphia for the Primary there? Well, they did go and they had very different experiences.

Irina wanted to schmooze around with the rich and famous in the Clinton camp. Fred wanted to see his brother and help out in the Obama campaign. Rick went down there to help his fellow Republicans and do what he can for McCain. I’ll be frank with ya, Rick’s not a political guy, I don’t think he even knew what he was getting himself into. The two politicos were going, so he just picked up and left. He loves road trips–any excuse, and he’s there with his car.

This is what Irina told me when they got back, “Fred and Rick dropped me off at campaign headquarters. I went in, introduced myself and the guy in charge put me straight to work. He was a real dork type, ya know? He had no sense of style, or even color coordination–I can’t believe he was in charge! I mean, how can a person like that know of my abilities. So he told me to canvass a neighborhood, luckily I had a partner–Amy. Of course she was wearing sneakers! She said she was studying at Drexel. Man, my heels were killing me, I had these really nice Jimmy Choo shoes. I had to walk really big blocks to cover the neighborhood. By the end of the day, I walked so much one of my heels came off! And they were my favorite shoes!”

Rick cuts in, “That’s what you get for not being prepared.” As if he was prepared. He didn’t even find the McCain headquarters. He got lost. He didn’t do any homework, he didn’t even look up where the headquarters would be! What he found was Pat’s King of Steaks, so he parked himself for the rest of the day having hoagies. He met really nice college girls and got their numbers. At least now he has places to stay next time he goes into Philly.

Fred had a different experience all together, he hung out with one of his foster brothers in North Philly. He spoke to people who are fighting against foreclosures, “I spoke to people in their homes, who might not even have homes come election day,” said Fred, “They’re getting loans, but they’re getting more and more in debt. They don’t want to be out of their jobs and not have a roof over their heads, too. Nationwide, as many as two million foreclosures may occur this year.” Fred seemed to be really worried, and I could sense his frustration. “Things aren’t moving fast enough for folks,” Fred said in a sigh.

Guess what I just learned about my man Rick? He’s been secretly going out with crazy Kaitlin! I wouldn’t have known about it either if they hadn’t ended up in jail. Apparently, the two have been dating for a while. Call it spring fever or drunken stupidity, they decided to go skinny dipping. Of course they were caught! I was sooo mad when Rick called me up interrupting my beauty sleep. “Bob, can you pick us up at the station?” Rick asked. I was sleepy and said, “Station? You don’t take buses or trains, which station are you at?”

“No, the police station. Kaitlin and I got arrested,” Rick informed me. Why am I the only one to save his neck all the time? I don’t know. But I had to get out of bed and get him. I blew up at Rick when he told me why they were arrested. “They caught you guys NAKED! Skinny dipping in this weather? What are you, polar bears?” I yelled at him. “Yes, naked. Now, can we go?” I felt like I was picking up two naughty kids at the principal’s office. Rick and Kaitlin are really double trouble. I don’t know what he’s thinking!

This week’s Zen quote comes from an American novelist and fellow editor, Edgar Watson Howe. He wrote, “If a friend is in trouble, don’t annoy him by asking if there is anything you can do. Think up something appropriate and do it.” Do you know a friend in need? How are you supporting him or her?