Coming out of Grand Central Terminal, I greeted Megan who was already waiting for me. She looked so gloomy. “You look so down! All okay?” I asked. “Nothing feels right at the moment. Let’s sit somewhere and talk,” she replied.

We went to a nearby cafe. I could feel the festive fervor around me. Placing our orders I asked, “Now tell me what happened. Why do you look this upset?” She took a while to settle herself.  ”I am not getting enough clients on board for my work. I see my friends Rick and Kendal doing so well. They really know how to pitch. I feel like a loser sometimes.”

“Why do you need to compete with them? How are they coming in the scenario?” I asked. “Of course they do come. We are in the same field. I can measure my success after evaluating myself with them,” she expressed. “Here is where you are going wrong, Megan,” I expressed. “Why?” she asked.

“When you are competing yourself with someone else, you are evaluating yourself on the basis of their values and metrics. Even if you do well, you will be doing well on something which is significant to them and not you. It will be an illusion. You will not assess yourself rightly,” I expressed.  

“If I don’t do that then I will never know the benchmark,” she answered. “You will know. Set a benchmark for yourself every day. Take your performance a notch higher every time. The trick lies in raising the standard of your own work every day. In this way you get better and there is no external pressure,” I expressed.   

“It is not that easy as it sounds,” she said. “It is not easy but it is not difficult either. It needs regular practice. Once you start doing this every day, you boost your confidence. Being persistent with your efforts will make the results inevitable. Trust me,” I expressed.

“You are right! This is a very constructive way of competition. I will do this from now on. I’m not going to focus on others achievements but mine,” she replied. “Yes! Just do this and see. I’m sure you will do a lot better,” I said. ”You know Bob, I feel so elated now,” she replied. “That’s great. Now let’s order some desserts or would you like to go for some retail therapy?” I asked. She laughed. “You know me too well. Let’s go for some shopping,” she replied. “I know. It always helps!” I expressed and then we went ahead with retail therapy.  

Often we get intimidated by others success not realizing that the focus should be vested on us. It is considered a nobility to compete with oneself. The competition should be with who you are against who you want to be. If you do better than yesterday that will help to set a better future for tomorrow. This way you will always stand out. Maybe, every time it won’t be possible to perform better than the last time but you will definitely win more than what you lose.

Let us accomplish better with a new practice!