Having to argue with your Significant Other is a painful proposition in itself. There may be a lot of logical things that you have to say, and you can’t wait to begin. When you do get the chance to start speaking, you speak animatedly and sometimes yell your lungs out to get your point across. Does it help? I don’t think so. Arguing with an agitated mind is self-defeating because in times of agitation, your brain isn’t logical, how can you expect your partner to talk logic? Head banging wont take you anywhere. So the first tip is, calm yourself down. You can never talk sense when you are yelling at the top of your voice, and frankly, your partner doesn’t deserve it either.

When you think you’re losing control over your speech, shut up. It’s better not to say anything, than say something that is nasty. Try not to say something that you’ll regret later. Think before you speak and make sure your partner understands what you are trying to say. When you yell at each other, nobody hears another, and the whole purpose is defeated. Listen to what your partner is saying and answer accordingly, instead of shouting out pre-planned answers. Always insist on a discussion that is calmly debated.

Once you come to a conclusion and resolve the issue, forget about it. Don’t bring this up when you argue again. Laugh about it when the matter is resolved. An argument between couples is generally because you are being honest to each other. Celebrate the fact that you have a channel of communication open and that is not something that you should take for granted. After a fight, when you get back again, take it as a fresh start and take it then on. Good luck!