Love shines through our darkest hours.
February brings with it a delightful time to celebrate the first ever emotive attribute which beholds the universe together, love. Whenever I feel a lack I do a ‘love–check’ and I start feeling abundant and replenished instantly. You just have to bring the awareness to ‘love’ no matter the reason of the drift.
Love can lead to great friendships and lasting relationships. I have noticed often those who are having trouble with relationships are living in a self-sabotaging pattern. Everything outside is just a mirror which tries to bring you close to your inner state which is love. The separation exists no more, the moment you soak in the awareness of overwhelming love of which you are a reservoir. You feel one with all. Jealousy, complaints, anger, negativity drops and you are filled with compassion and empathy.
I’ve had my detour too when I got entangled in the mayhem of my clouded thinking which took me away from my awareness of love. It was not long back when I sat in the dungeon of my mind and wherever I went it turned to an unpleasant war zone. I had arguments with friends and unnecessary tiffs with my family. I quit my job and blamed it on the system and my rowdy superior. My house would reek of the smoke and stubs would line up the floor. Empty bottles of alcohol would roll out of the bed when I woke up in the morning and stepped out of the warm blanket put there by Aaliyah in the middle of the night. It was difficult for her and she would have tears in her eyes seeing me in the phase which I now call the dark night of the soul. She would clean the house silently and bring me a hot cup of coffee to combat my hangover. I had put on a lot of pounds and my personality was distorted. Kong, my pet would sniff me as if I was a stranger in my own house. It is still disheartening to think of the time.
Her love brought me out of the black hole and during that time she made me meet a friend of hers, Myra, who is spiritually inclined and teaches meditation and spirituality in universities. She helped me see the day and realign with the generous flow of love within me.
The first thing I learned was to love myself unconditionally and accept every attribute of the self without being judgmental. When we learn to appreciate ourselves we are fixing up the lens through which we see the world. I was asked to practice gratefulness regularly, which meant being thankful and appreciative of the blessings I have. My true Valentine taught me love is this sweet responsibility of being there when the rest of the world forgets about you totally.
Gradually, with reflections, meditations and lots of love and care I stepped out of the night. It was a beautiful Sunday when we stepped out of the church and my friends met me with warmth and love as if we had never parted! Laughter and giggles echoed in the air; Aaliyah was loudest of us all. I was happy to be with her and all my folks.
That night when I said to her, “Sorry I’ve been such a disappointment for you,” her smile faded and I spontaneously corrected myself and said, “Thank you for having hope in me this whole time.” And we both smiled with our heads touching.
Be love, give love and realize its sweet responsibility.
Happy Valentine’s Day my amigos!